To Date or Not to Date

Why do people date? Personally, I have never been one to date just to date. I’m not desperate to have some Dark Chocolate arm candy. Nor do I feel the need to have someone just because all of my friends are settling down and having families. I date with the hopes of finding a man that I connect with (and maybe God willing he will also have the potential of possibly being my boyfriend/husband one day). As I young lady who is really into keeping a positive image, I tend to date males who have solid goals and are doing well for themselves. I have had a couple of failed relationships. At first, I thought that something must be wrong with me. But to me, everything happens for a reason. I know that someday, I will find a male that is suitable to me and my standards. But first, I need to understand how men operate. No matter how much I talk to my male friends, my male cousins, and the psychiatrist, I just don’t understand men. I cannot grasp the things that they do.

Lately, I have been hearing a lot of talk about Act Like A Lady, Think Like a Man by Steve Harvey. I decided to check it out. So for the next few days I will abstract some of the tips from the book to discuss. Steve discusses what drives men. From early on men are taught that they are defined by Who he is, What he does, and How much he makes. These three things are important for a man and make him feel solid. According to Steve, they are important because knowing those three things makes a man feel stable. When a man knows these three things, he can be a better man to his woman. But should a man wait until he has ALL three in order to get a special lady? If so, how does he know that his woman is down for him or just down for his status and money?

A lot of my male friends feel like they could never be with a woman who makes more money than them. I asked why and they all say because the man is number one, and he makes the rules. They also feel like it would compromise their ego. They think the woman will try to set all of the rules. But is it only the woman that they are concerned about or do they think that their boys will clown them?

Ladies, how do you feel about dating a man who may not know exactly Who he is, What he wants to do, or Make a decent salary? Do you work with him to help him grow so that the two of you can progress together? Is fair to yourself to accept a man who doesn’t have all three things in order?

Please pick up the book Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man by Steve Harvey so we can read it together. (If you cannot get a copy, please email me and I will help you out)